Open Book / Creative Writing / 2-15-12-2025-7534 – Christmas and Keats themes. 1. I´m the turkey lurkey 2. I´m a stocking Don´t be a-mocking. 3. All I got was a card. St. Spyridon of Tremithus´s message and warning. 4. Joys of a 60s Christmas. I´ve got a new stove. All mauve! 5. Tribute to Keats, starting with a line from a poem of his. Plus an Ode to Cunk. Of hemlock have we drunk!

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Open Book / Creative Writing / 2-15-12-2025-7534 – Christmas and Keats themes. 1. I´m the turkey lurkey 2. I´m a stocking  Don´t be a-mocking. 3. All I got was a card. St. Spyridon of Tremithus´s message and warning. 4. Joys of a 60s Christmas. I´ve got a new stove. All mauve! 5. Tribute to Keats, starting with a line from a poem of his. Plus an Ode to Cunk. Of hemlock have we drunk!

1. I´m the turkey lurkey

I´m the turkey

lurkey

And the lackey

Everyone

under the sun

expects me

you see

As mum

to cook

in a snook

And all they have to do

all cock-a-doo

Is wait until I say

“Hey,

it´s time to come”

To the table

As your Aunt Mable

My work

Whilst others shirk

And I´m cooking a bun

in my oven

and also in theirs

preparing heirs

Is never done!

2. I´m a stocking

Don´t be a-mocking

I´m a stocking

Don´t be a-mocking

I´ve had many an orange

and the odd lorenge

in my time

While the Christmas bells chime

I´ve been used to cover up the odd crime

And have contained many little toys

For girls

With their whirls

And boys.

I´ve had chocolate and cream

To make them scream

And for people's guts

I´ve even had some nuts!

3. All I got was a card. St. Spyridon of Tremithus´s message and warning

All I got

Well shot

was a card

full of lard

Ãnd a number

to make me

you see

Slumber

Like

a

spike

and a cucumber

I´m not shy

about sending

my never ending

usual reply

Thank you

dear Drew

For your card

Here is a shard

of light

To give you some insight

My card will not reach you

dear shrew

in time

for the big chime

of the Western pseudo-Christmas

or maybe even its Candlemas

But, it should be in good time

I´ll opine

For the real Christmas

Or at least the twelth day

of it I´d say

Which means it will arrive

by January 18th in the civil calendar

In time to enjoy some lavendar

In the meantime

I´d like to opine

December 12 in the liturgical calendar is the 25th in the civil calendar

When we have our lavendar

Wishing you all a Happy St. Herman of Alaska and St. Spiridon of Tremithus day!

Kalos Ayios Spiridonos!

Amongst all the Moss!

And may you avoid the fate

Of the New Calendarist bishop of Larissa who died for celebrating on the wrong date

In that year of yore

1934

When I, Spiridon

Came along

And warned him

Amidst the din

That it was my day

And that he wouldn´t finish the Liturgy

You see

If he did not celebrate

That. He laughed at me

You see

But then died in the middle of the Liturgy!

4. Joys of a 60s Christmas. I´ve got a new stove. All mauve!

I´ve got a new stove

All mauve.

I hope it will save me time

As Christmas bells

with their lovely smells

Do chime.

I´ve got a hoover too

And an iron

which I´ll call Byron

Now I wonder what´s in my stocking shoe!?

5. Tribute to Keats, starting with a line from a poem of his. Plus an Ode to Cunk. Of hemlock have we drunk!

My sense, as though of hemlock I had drunk,

Was that I smelled

and belled

Like a skunk

Then I thought

and was bought

What about Cunk

What would she say

Why are you harming

rather than charming

the daffodils

With your trills

And you´re having fun

Under the sun

With your thrills

And spills

Enjoy it while it lasts

Along with your repasts

Because it may not be long

Before life

With its strife

So short

And cort

Is gone!