London University, Goldsmith´s College Open Book Programme - Creative Writing - Monday 17-30-9-2024-7533 pieces by Adrian Whyatt

Memory Stick Reference: 12/Volumes/AZUL CLARO/Open Book/Creative Writing/17-30-9-2024-7533.docx

London University, Goldsmith´s College Open Book Programme - Creative Writing - Monday 17-30-9-2024-7533 pieces by Adrian Whyatt

X posting @Adrian Whyatt: 3 pieces I wrote today for the free online open to all London University #Goldsmith´s College #Open #Book Programme (can be used to access degree courses) creative writing class: 1. The bird and the cat in the cage. 2. I win! 3. Ruck in the back of a truck


https://adrianwhyattcreativewritingetc.blogspot.com/2024/09/london-university-goldsmiths-college.html


1. The bird and the cat in the cage


Scene: a little yellow budgerigar, Bruce, is on top of a bird cage, which a striped cat, Cathy, has managed to get herself trapped under


Cathy the Cat: Could you please grab the handle of the cage with your feet, fly up and take it up in the air, so I can escape.


Bruce the Budgerigar: I’m much too small to be able to lift up the cage.


Cathy: No you´re not. I saw a Budgerigar smaller than you do it with a similar cage the other day.


Bruce: I´ve hurt my wing.


Cathy: How did you manage such a good landing then.


Bruce: Just did


Cathy: Please.


Bruce: No, you’ll have to wait until our owner is back. 


Cathy: That’s cruel.


Bruce: I saw that Budgerigar lift up the cage. You showed your thanks by eating it. You’re pregnant and have a craving for budgerigars, you said to another budgerigar who caught you doing it!


2. I win!


I win!

But what an awful din!


But, fighting a war

You don´t care what´s the score


If you´re a conscript in the Ukraine

You just don´t want a bullet in the brain


You´re a Marxist, that´s Groucho, not Karl,

You snarl!


As Groucho opines:

“War is when people who don´t know each other at all,

Kill each other on behalf of people who know each other very well.” For the cannon fodder that certainly chimes!


Well, that sure rings a bell,

thought the conscript, because for us, war is just sheer hell!


3.


He said: “From the back of the truck…”


She said: “On the night of the full moon…”


He said: “The one thing I know for sure…”


She said: “Is that I want to have a full ruck..”


My life came to be,

Thus, as you can see,

Thank you Mummy and Daddy


For your ruck

By moonlight

In a truck!

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